60+ Best Washington D.C. Puns

Ahoy there, fellow Washingtonians! Are you ready to take a break from the serious business of politics and soak in the city’s witty side? It’s time to get your DC pun game on!

Washington, DC is a city full of history, culture, and of course, puns. From the White House to the monuments and all the landmarks in between, this city is full of puns and wordplay that are sure to make you chuckle.

The next time you’re walking around the city, keep an eye out for some of these witty wordplays. There’s nothing like a clever pun to make your day a little brighter. So, without further ado, here are some of the most creative Washington DC puns!

Funny Washington D.C. Puns

1.  Why don’t they play poker in Washington D.C.? Because it’s too political!

2.   What do you call a powerful politician from Washington D.C.?  A District Attor-knee!

3.  What did the Washington D.C. tourist say? “You can always capital-ize on a good trip!”

4.  How did George Washington become the father of his nation? With lots of parental guidance!

5.  What kind of trees are in the National Mall? They’re Capitol Trees!

6.   Why don’t any birds land on the White House lawn anymore? Because there’s an Eagle-eye security system keeping watch!

7.   What do you call a smug chicken in Washington DC?A Capitol Poultry!

8.  What did George Washington yell when he crossed the Potomac? “River calling!”

9.  Why do politicians in DC always walk really slow down the street? Because they’re on Capitol Hill!

10.   Where do senators go to get breakfast each morning? To a constitu-tional cafe!

11.   Why did the president’s speech in Washington D.C. drAwe a small crowd? Because it was too Bill-itering!

12.   What did the Washington Monument say to its friends? Let’s get together for an obelisk time!

13.   What do you call a Washington D.C. politician who spends too much time on the internet? A Capitol Browsing!

14.   What did George Washington call his skateboard?  The Grand Old Deck

15.   What did the Washington Monument say to its peers? “I’m feeling so much taller than before!”

16.  What do you call a Washington DC politician who is also a chef? A Congressional Steward.

17.  What do you call a successful bill in Washington D.C.? A legislation winner!

Washington D.C Capitol Puns

18.  The Capitol building is a real “hill-arious” sight to see!

19.   You could say that the Capitol is the “dome” of American politics.

20.   Congress sure knows how to “lobby” for their causes in the Capitol.

21.  The Capitol is where laws are “minted” and passed.

22.   I’m sure the politicians in the Capitol are always “congresses” with work.

23.    You could say that the Capitol is the “white house” of American legislative power.

24.   The Capitol is where politicians go to “senate” their differences.

25.   The Capitol is where the real “elephant” in the room is the donkey.

26.   The Capitol is where politicians are always “debating” the issues.

27.   The Capitol is where the politicians are always “floor-ed” with questions.

28.   You could say that the Capitol is the “heart” of American politics.

29.   The Capitol is where politicians are always “bill-ing” their constituents.

30.   The Capitol is where American democracy is “president-ed” over.

31.   The Capitol is where politicians are always “caucus-ing” over legislation.

32.   The Capitol is where politicians are always “represent-in” their districts.

Washington D.C. Puns Instagram

33.  “I’m Capitol-sized by the beauty of D.C.”

34.  “Washington D.C. has monument-al sights to see.”

35.   “I’m not lion, the National Zoo is paw-some!”

36.  “DC is a State of Mind”

37.  “I’m Washington on my way around D.C.”

38.  “DC, where the puns are Lincoln up.”

39.   “DC, where even the streets are Capital-ized.”

40.   “It’s not just politics that’s bipartisan in D.C. – the food is too!”

41.   “I’m having a Monu-MINT-al time in D.C.”

42.   “DC is where the monuments are marble-ous.”

43.   “D.C. – where the history is amazing.”

Best Washington D.C. Puns

44.    I don’t know what’s wrong with my DC-9… it keeps crashing near the Mall!

45.   To make room in Congress, they have to employ a Capitol punishment..

46.   Being from D.C., I’m used to going out late and keeping Georgetown hours!

47.   Every day from my patio, I watch planes fly over Reagan Airport – all aboard Airforce One-liner!

48.   DC doesn’t need superheroes because it has Hill-a-ry!

49.   Every election cycle in Washington is a Capitol Idea.

50.  Jefferson and Adams were founding fathers, but only one was a Founding Mother—Martha Madison!

51.  The White House hasn’t had this much drama since Watergate!

52.   It’s not easy being green on Capitol Hill. (It’s Not Easy Serving Your Country)

53.   He wanted to go cheverly, but had no wheels! (He Wanted To Go Somewhere But Had No Transportation)

54.    I’m such an Adams Morgan for that joke! (I Love That Joke!)

55.    Don’t be Dupont Circle, shared it with your friends too!(Don’t Keep The Fun To Yourself – Share It With Others!)

56.   The capital is DC, so let’s cheer ’cause we love our home and don’t want to leave here!”

57.   “Washington D.C., what an oppor-tuna-ty for fun.”

58.    I’m pretty sure DC stands for “Darn Creative”.

59.  The Capitol Building was built in such a hurry that you can still see the Capital gains on it!

60.   D.C.’s signature move is the “Capitol Spin”!

61.   You must be a real Washingtonian to master all of its pun-monials!

62.  Capitalize on yourself while you’re here—look up some cool sights at your nation’s capital!

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Final Thoughts

Whether you’re a native of the Nation’s Capital or just a visitor, these Washington D.C. puns are sure to bring a smile to your face. From the White House to the Smithsonian, DC has it all, and the puns that come out of the city are sure to keep you laughing. So if you’re looking for a little lightheartedness and humor, these DC puns are for you.