Rev Up Your Laughter with 120+ Full-time Car Gas Jokes

Fuel up on laughter with a collection of hilarious car gas jokes. From clever puns about filling up at the pump to witty one-liners about the rising cost of gasoline, these jokes are sure to rev up your sense of humor.

Whether you’re a regular on the road or just appreciate a good automotive chuckle, these gas-related jokes will have you rolling on the floor. Get ready to cruise through a lighthearted exploration of the lighter side of car fuel.

Funny Car Gas Jokes

1. Eat, sleep, gas up, repeat. My life motto now that I drive a gas-guzzler.

2. I couldn’t find the fuel-efficient car of my dreams, so I just dream of finding a gas station with lower prices instead.

3. Start your engine and speed on over to the nearest gas station – because let’s face it, your car’s thirstier than a marathon runner in the Sahara.

4. Nothing beats the feeling of hitting the open highway in a luxurious gas-guzzler, except maybe the feeling of not having to mortgage your house to fill up the tank.

5. Racing to the gas station before your tank hits empty is life; everything else is just sitting in traffic.

6. Handling a gas-guzzler is like playing a high-stakes game of financial roulette – one wrong move and you’re emptying your wallet faster than you can say “premium unleaded.”

7. Losing a race to the gas station teaches you a valuable lesson in humility and budgeting.

8. Fast cars like Porsches and Ferraris may be things of beauty, but have you seen the fuel economy on those bad boys? It’s enough to make you cry into your gas pump.

9. Electric cars may not have the roar of a V8 engine, but they do have the sweet sound of silence…and a much smaller gas bill.

10. Eat, sleep, charge up, repeat. My new life motto now that I’ve switched to an electric car.

11. Gas prices are like bad jokes – they keep going up, and nobody’s laughing.

12. My car’s gas mileage is so bad, I’m considering adding “professional gas guzzler” to my resume.

13. Ever notice how gas stations always have the best views of your hard-earned money disappearing?

14. My car’s fuel efficiency is so poor, it’s like paying rent to the gas station every month.

15. Gas prices are like the weather forecast – you never know whether to expect a slight drizzle or a full-blown storm at the pump.

16. My car’s gas tank is like a bottomless pit – the more money I pour into it, the emptier it seems to get.

17. Ever feel like you’re in a one-sided relationship with your car? It takes all your money and leaves you stranded on the side of the road.

18. Gas prices are like a roller coaster ride – one minute you’re up, the next you’re plummeting back down to reality.

19. My car’s gas gauge is like a heart rate monitor – it spikes every time I see the prices at the pump.

20. I don’t need a to find the nearest gas station; I just follow the trail of tears left by my bank account.

Gas Cars Jokes

21. The future doesn’t need gas stations. Shift to electric mode and charge towards success.

22. Start your engine and speed on over to the nearest gas station – because running out of gas is a roadblock to success.

23. Dude, where’s my car? Oh wait, I think it’s still stuck at the gas pump, crying over the price per gallon.

24. We’ll be riding forever, or at least until gas prices hit the stratosphere and we’re forced to sell our kidneys to fill up the tank.

26. A car is for any person and every purpose, as long as that purpose doesn’t involve spending all your money on gasoline.

27. These days, the most liberating experience is knowing you can drive wherever and whenever you want to, as long as you have enough gas money to get there.

29. I don’t pray for love. I just pray for gas prices to miraculously drop overnight.

29. Be bolder. Do better. Drive electric. Because nothing says “success” like leaving gas stations in the rearview mirror.

30. Life’s a road trip – you’re either driving towards financial freedom or getting taken for a ride by the oil companies.

31. The future is electric. 

32. Get there sooner and leave gas-guzzling dinosaurs in the past where they belong.

33. Respect a man’s gas tank, and the gas station attendant respects your walk.

34. Men love women, but even more than that, men love cars. And if those cars run on gas, well, that’s just true love.

35. No one will buy you gas for your car. You have to earn it, one paycheck at a time.

35. The cars we drive say a lot about us, like whether we prefer premium or regular unleaded.

36. Inside the car is truly my own personal space, especially when I’m belting out ’80s power ballads while stuck in traffic.

37. A gas-guzzler will not change your life, but it will definitely change your bank account balance.

38. If you don’t look back at your gas gauge after filling up, you might just own the wrong car…or you’re just in denial about your fuel consumption.

39. Take care of your gas mileage in the garage, and your wallet will take care of you at the pump.

40. No girl will choose a six-pack over six cars, so stop worrying about your abs and start worrying about your gas mileage.

41. There’s a lot of stress in life. But once you get in the car and see the gas prices.

42. All that stress goes out the window…and into your budget.

Kids Drive Car Without Gas Jokes

43.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas?  Because they wanted to “pump” up the fun!

44.  Why did the kids take a car with no gas on a road trip?  They wanted to make it a “drive”-thru adventure!

45.  What do you call a car driven by kids with no gas?  A “fuel”-ish attempt at transportation!

46.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas to the ice cream shop?

They were hoping for some “sundae” driving!

47.  Why did the kids try to drive a car without gas to the amusement park?

They thought it would be a “roller-coaster” ride even before getting there!

48.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas to the library?  They were hoping for some “book”-ing it down the road!

49.  How did the kids feel when they realized the car had no gas?  They were “exhausted” with the situation!

50.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas to the soccer field?

They wanted to practice their “dribbling” skills even before the game!

51.  What did the kids do when they realized the car had no gas?  They decided to have a “pedal”-powered race instead!

52.  Why did the kids drive their toy car without gas?  Because they wanted to be eco-friendly and have a “play and pedal” experience!

53.  What did the little car say to the kids when it ran out of gas?  “You’re driving me crazy!”

54.  Why did the children drive a car without gas?  They wanted to give their parents a chance to catch up on their jogging!

55.  Why did the kids choose to drive a car without gas?  They wanted to practice their imaginary driving skills for their future road trip to CandyLand!

56.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas?  They wanted to save money for an epic ice cream party!

57.  How did the children manage to drive a car without gas?  They installed a “kid-powered engine” that ran on laughter and fun!

58.  Why did the kids drive a car without gas?  They were participating in the “Zero Emissions Grand Prix for Future Racers” and wanted to set a new record!

59.  What did the kids do when their car ran out of gas?  They pretended it was a spaceship and zoomed off to explore the cosmos!

60.  Why did the children drive a car without gas?  They were competing in the “Imaginary Fuel Efficiency Challenge” and wanted to win the trophy for the most creative and imaginative ride!

Kids Drive Car Without Gas Jokes

Car Gas Jokes One Liner

61.  What do you get when you combine a car and a pet?  A motorized companion!

62.  Why are pigs terrible drivers? They swine-dle the roads!

63.  What happens when you mix a Mustang and an elephant?  A colossal convertible!

74.  Where do dogs leave their vehicles?  In the parking lot “woof!”

75.  Why do chicken coops have only two entrances?  They prefer a sleek poultry sedan.

76.  What occurs when a frog’s car breaks down?  It becomes a toad-ally stranded vehicle!

76.  What kind of fuel does Freddy Krueger use for his car?  Nightmarish energy.

76.  What did Harry Potter say when his car ran out of gas?  Expecto Petroleum Maxima!

77.  What magical words did Elon Musk employ to fend off gas car companies?  Expecto Petroleum Protecto!

78.  What’s Elon Musk’s preferred movie genre?  Anti-gas car adventures!

79.  Which African country does TESLA founder Elon Musk hail from?  The land of Mad-at-gas-car!

80.  Why do people in Africa solely embrace electric cars?  They’re Mad-at-gas-cars enthusiasts.

Car Gas Jokes One Liner

81.  Why did the cookie shed tears?  Its father was a wafer who departed for good.

82.  How do you arrange a party in outer space?  You planet spectacularly!

83.  Where can you purchase chicken broth in bulk?  At the stock market, of course!

84.  What happens when Kermit the Frog’s vehicle breaks down?  It turns into a toad-ally immobilized car.

85.  Why is Miss Piggy such an inadequate driver?  She loves to hog the road.

86.  What kind of vehicle does a chicken prefer?  A comfortable and cozy coop-mobile.

87.  Why can’t motorcycles engage in push-ups?  They are constantly two-wheeled and worn-out.

88.  Kids, guess what?   I bought the cat a brand new car!

Hilarious Car Gas Puns

89.  I purchased a vehicle fueled by alcohol, not gasoline, setting me apart from the crowd.

90.  To my wife’s delight, I surprised her by replenishing her vehicle with fuel today.

91.  Car pools, often hailed, are overhyped and ultimately more expensive in terms of fuel expenses.

92.  On a single day, my father acquired an electric plug-in car and a gas-guzzling muscle car simultaneously.

93.  He shared his reasoning, believing that owning a Charger alongside a battery-powered car would be advantageous.

94.  Stranded on the roadside, I found myself without fuel, when suddenly a swarm of bees appeared.

95.  During our road trip, we made a pit stop to refuel our vehicle.

96.  The sights I witnessed while commuting back from work last night are beyond belief.

97.  While slicing cheese, I accidentally cut my finger, though I suspect my troubles may run deeper.

98.  My feline companion left an unpleasant surprise on the carpet, indicating that it’s not feeling well.

99.  I heard Gordon Ramsey owns an impressive car. It must be Chef-rari.

100.  Back when Jimi Hendrix was 16, he got into a car crash. Luckily it was just a Guitar bender.

101.  If Yoda ran a business, I bet it would be Yoda’s Toy Shop.

102.  Accidentally, I drove my Subaru Outback into the river. Now it’s a Scuba-dive.

103.  Uncle Buck had a terrible car accident and lost his left arm and leg. But he’s alright now.

104.  My wife bet that I couldn’t afford a car by selling Chef Boyardee.

105.  You should have seen her surprise when I passed her driving my new ride.

106.  Two trucks carrying French cheese collided! Now there’s da’ brie all over the place.

107.  My car’s favorite mealtime is… Brake-fast.

Short Car Gas Jokes

108.  Why did the tortoise draw a “T” on his car’s hood?  Because he wanted people to exclaim, “Look at that T-car go!” as he cruised by.

109.  What happens when Kermit the Frog’s car breaks down?  It becomes a toad-stall.

110.  Why is Miss Piggy such a terrible driver?  She’s always swine-ing all over the road.

111.  What type of vehicle does a chicken prefer?  A hatch-mobile.

112.  Why can’t bicycles do push-ups? Because they’re always cycle-tired.

113.  What kind of car does the dog despise?  A Bark-uar.

114.  Did you know that Teslas come with a distinct “new car” scent?  They call it “Musk’s Aroma.”

115.  What has four wheels and attracts insects?  A garbage truck.

116.  What did the traffic light tell the car?  “Turn your head while I change color!”

117.  Where do dogs park their cars? In the woofing lot.

118.  What has 10 letters and begins with G-A-S?  An automobile.

119.  What kind of vehicle does Skeletor drive?  A Skele-coupe.

120.  What’s worse than a heavy downpour?  A hailstorm of taxis.

121.  Did you know that all cars have snakes?  They’re known as windshield serpents.

122.  When does a vehicle stop being a vehicle?  When it transforms into a driveway.

123.  Have you heard about the scientist who crossbred a Mustang with an elephant?  Now he has a convertible with an enormous trunk.

Some final Talk

To sum it up, car gas jokes offer a light-hearted and amusing way to find humor in the world of automobiles and fuel. These jokes bring a smile to your face and add a playful twist to conversations about cars and gas. They remind us that laughter can be found in everyday situations, even at the gas pump.

So, the next time you fill up your car, take a moment to enjoy a good chuckle with these humorous jokes. Let the joy and laughter brighten your day and make your journey a little more enjoyable.

If you want to hear more about jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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