Crack open the laughter with our collection of hilarious peanut jokes. From nutty puns to playful wordplay, these jokes will have you in stitches. Whether you’re a peanut lover or simply enjoy a good chuckle, these nut-themed jokes are sure to add some flavor to your day.
Peanuts are a beloved snack and ingredient, enjoyed by many people around the world. However, did you know that peanuts can also be a source of humor and laughter?
Peanut jokes and puns can range from innocent and lighthearted to a bit more risqué, playing on the word’s double meaning as both a nuts and a term for crazy behavior.
Regardless of the tone of the joke, peanut humor can put a smile on the face of those who hear it, making them a fun and enjoyable topic for those that appreciate a good laugh.
Funny Peanut Jokes
1. Why did the peanut go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling a little nuts!
2. What did one peanut say to the other peanut on a hot summer day?
Let’s get roasted!
3. What’s the difference between peanut butter and jam?
You can’t peanut butter your way out of a sticky situation!
4. How do you make a peanut laugh?
You crack it up!
5. Why did the peanut take a job as a detective?
Because it was good at cracking cases!
6. Why did the peanut break up with the grape?
Because it found someone butter!
7. What do you call a peanut that’s dressed in fancy clothes?
A nut in a tux!
8. Why did the peanut go to the gym?
To get a little nutty!
9. What do you call a peanut that’s been caught stealing?
A peanut butter thief!
10. What did the peanut say when it got a job at a bank?
I’m just a small nut in a big bank!
11. Why did the peanut go to outer space?
To become an astronut!
12. How do you get a peanut to stop sneezing?
You take away its shell phone!
13. Why did the peanut get a ticket?
Because it was caught jaywalking across the street!
14. What do you get when you cross a peanut with a mouse?
A peanut butter and jelly sandwich!
15. Why did the peanut take up skydiving?
It wanted to be a little nutty!
16. Why did the peanut break up with the cashew?
It just wasn’t their cup of tea-nut!
17. Why did the peanut join Twitter?
To get more followers!
18. What did the peanut say when it was offered a job as a magician’s assistant?
Sure, I’m always up for a little shell game!
19. What do you call a group of peanuts watching a football game?
The shell-terers!
Jokes About Peanuts
Peanuts are a beloved snack food all around the world. They are a versatile ingredient that can be used in a variety of dishes, from savory to sweet. But did you know that peanuts can also be a source of humor?
That’s right – peanut jokes are a thing, and they are sure to make you laugh. Without further ado, here are some of the best peanut jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone:
20. Why did the peanut go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling a little nutty!
21. What do you call a peanut that sings?
A goober note!
22. Why don’t peanuts tell jokes?
Because they might crack up!
23. What did the peanut say to the elephant?
Nothing, it was too small to be heard!
24. Why do peanuts make good spies?
Because they’re always undercover!
25. How do you make a peanut laugh?
You crack it up!
26. Why did the peanut go to school?
To get a degree in nut-trition!
27. What do you call a peanut that’s been roasted for too long?
A burnt offering!
28. What did the peanut say to the cashew?
“Hey, you’re nuts!”
29. How do you know if a peanut is allergic to peanuts?
It starts to swell up!
30. Why don’t peanuts play basketball?
They always end up getting roasted!
31. What do you call a peanut with a top hat and cane?
A peanut butter and jelly roll!
32. Why did the peanut go to space?
To become an astro-nut!
33. What do you call a peanut that’s always late?
A procrastinut!
34. What did the peanut say to the almond?
“You’re a real nut-case!”
35. Why did the peanut put on sunscreen?
To keep from turning into peanut butter!
36. What do you call a peanut that’s been stuck in your teeth all day?
An oral-nutrition supplement!
37. Why did the peanut get in trouble with the law?
Because it was caught dealing in salted nuts!
Peanut Puns Funny
38. “I’m totally nuts about peanuts!”
39. “Peanut butter and jelly, the perfect duo.”
40. “Peanuts, the perfect snack for any occasion.”
41. “I’m a little peanut, short and stout.”
42. “I’m all peanuts and no filler.”
43. “I’m the peanut butter to your jelly.”
44. “I’m nutty for peanuts, what about you?”
45. “Peanut butter and chocolate, a match made in heaven.”
46. Don’t be a shellfish, share your peanuts!
47. I’m a little nutty, but aren’t we all?
48. You’re the peanut butter to my jelly.
49. I’m not peanut butter, but I’m on a roll.
50. That’s just the way the cookie crumbles-nutty!
51. This situation is driving me peanuts!
52. Peanut, peanut butter, and jelly time!
Jokes About Peanut Butter
Peanuts are one of the most beloved and iconic snacks in the world. They are perfect for snacking, cooking, and even making jokes!
If you’re a fan of peanuts and love a good laugh, then you’re in luck. We’ve compiled a list of the best peanut jokes that are sure to make you crack up.
53. What do you call a peanut butter sandwich that sticks to the roof of your mouth?
A PB&JAM!
54. Why did the grape jelly break up with the peanut butter?
It just wasn’t his jam.
55. What do you get when you cross peanut butter and a dog?
A peanut butter retriever!
56. Why did the peanut butter cross the road?
To get to the peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the other side!
57. How do you make a peanut butter sandwich?
You spread some peanut butter on one slice of bread, and then you spread some peanut butter on the other slice of bread.
58. What did the peanut butter say to the jelly when they got married?
“We go together like peanut butter and jelly!”
59. Why did the peanut butter go to the bank?
To get a jar of money!
60. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything, even peanut butter!
61. Why did the peanut butter get a job as a detective?
Because it was good at getting to the bottom of things!
62. Why did the peanut butter go to the art museum?
To see the peanut butter and jelly painting!
63. What did the peanut butter say when it won the lottery?
“I’m really going to spread my wealth!”
64. What do you call a peanut butter that’s been in the fridge too long?
Cold and creamy!
65. Why did the peanut butter call the police?
Because it was being spread too thin!
66. What’s the difference between peanut butter and jam?
You can’t peanut butter your way out of a sticky situation.
67. Why did the peanut butter get kicked out of the restaurant?
Because it was too nutty!
68. What do you call a peanut butter that can’t dance?
Smooth, but not too creamy!
69. Why did the peanut butter go to the doctor again?
It was having an allergic reaction to jelly!
70. What do you get when you cross a peanut butter sandwich with a baseball bat?
A grand slamwich!
Peanut Butter and Jelly Puns
71. I’m nuts about you like peanut butter.
72. Spread the love with PB&J.
73. Jelly, you complete me.
74. PB&J – the ultimate comfort food.
75. I’m spreading happiness with this PB&J.
76. You’re the peanut butter to my jelly.
77. This sandwich is jam-packed with flavor.
78. I’m jelly of your sandwich.
79. We make the perfect pair, like PB&J.
80. I can’t get enough of this nutty combination.
81. Our love is like PB&J, it just sticks.
82. I’m so jelly that you have PB&J.
83. A sandwich without PB&J is just bread.
84. This sandwich is a real PB&J masterpiece.
85. I’m nuts about this sandwich.
86. PB&J is the sandwich of champions.
87. I’m spreading the love, one PB&J at a time.
88. Nothing beats a classic PB&J sandwich.
89. This sandwich is the jelly to my peanut butter.
90. PB&J – the perfect combination of sweet and savory.
91. Let’s make this sandwich a jam session
Best Peanut Jokes
Peanuts are more than just a tasty snack they’re also a great source of inspiration for jokes! Here are some of the best peanut jokes that will have you cracking up:
92. Why did the peanut butter go to the dentist?
To get a smooth filling!
93. Why did the peanut butter feel lonely?
Because it couldn’t jelly!
94. Why did the peanut go to the bar?
To get a little salted!
95. Why did the peanut go to the club?
To get roasted!
96. How do you make a peanut laugh?
You crack it up!
97. Why did the elephant hide his peanuts?
Because he didn’t want to share them with the other animals!
98. Why did the peanut butter leave the kitchen?
Because it wanted to spread its wings and fly!
99. Why did the peanut butter and jelly sandwich go to school?
To get smarter!
100. What do you call a peanut on a skateboard?
A peanut-butter-and-jelly-roll!
101. Why did the peanut get a job at the circus?
Because it was a good juggler!
102. Why did the peanut go to the movies?
To see Buttercup!
103. Why did the peanut go to the bar?
To get a little salted!
104. Why did the peanut cross the road?
To get to the other side!
105. Why did the peanut get a job as a teacher?
Because it was a good nut-turer!
106. Why did the peanut get a job?
Because it wanted to shell out some cash!
107. Have you heard about the new peanut movie?
It’s called “A Nutty Adventure!”
108. Why did the peanut butter get a restraining order?
Because it was being too jelly!
109. Why don’t peanuts tell jokes?
Because they always get roasted!
110. Why did the peanut go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling a little nutty!
111. Why don’t peanuts tell jokes?
Because they always get roasted!
112. Why did the peanut butter cross the road?
To get to the jelly side!
Peanut Jokes One Liners
113. Why did the elephant eat peanuts with its trunk?
Because it didn’t have any hands!
114. How do you make a peanut laugh?
Tickle its shell!
115. Why did the peanut butter get a ticket?
For being a little too jelly!
116. What do you call it when a peanut gets a haircut?
A nut cut!
117. Why did the peanut go to the doctor?
Because it was feeling a little nutty.
118. How do you know if a peanut is happy?
Itstarts cracking up.
118. Why did the peanut butter get a ticket?
Because it was caught speeding.
119. What do you call a peanut that’s been on fire?
A hot nut.
120. How do you make a peanut laugh?
You crack it up.
121. Why did the peanut get a job as a banker?
It wanted to be a cashewal.
122. What did the peanut say to the elephant?
Nothing, it was too busy being shell-shocked.
123. What do you call a peanut that’s always complaining?
A whine nut.
124. How do you keep a peanut from sneezing?
Take away its shell.
125. What’s a peanut’s favorite type of music?
Anything with a good beat.
126. How do you make a peanut disappear?
You make it go nuts.
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Final Thoughts
Peanuts are not only delicious, but they can also be a source of laughter. The jokes in this article are sure to bring a smile to your face, and they may even make you laugh out loud. So, the next time you’re feeling down, reach for a handful of peanuts and enjoy a good laugh.
