60+ Funny Macbeth Jokes

Discover the lighter side of the Scottish play with our Macbeth Jokes. These humorous quips will have you quoting Shakespeare with a smile. Uncover a cauldron of humor with these Macbeth Jokes. These witty jests will make you rethink Shakespeare’s darkest tale with a chuckle.

As one of Shakespeare’s most famous tragedies, Macbeth may not seem like the most obvious choice for comedic material. However, clever playwrights and performers have managed to find humor in even the darkest of stories.

Macbeth jokes can be a fun way to engage with the play and add some lightheartedness to discussions or performances. Here are a few Macbeth jokes to lighten the mood:

Best Macbeth Jokes

1.Why did Macbeth open a restaurant?  Because he wanted to serve some “bloody” good food!

2.  What do you call a Scottish play that’s also a great workout routine?  “Macbethletics”!

3.  Why did Macbeth take up gardening?  He wanted to plant some “bloody” good flowers!

4.  What did Lady Macbeth say when her husband asked for a snack?  “Out, damned hunger!”

5.  How did Macbeth feel when he lost his favorite pen? Absolutely “bard”!

6.  What do you call Macbeth when he’s stuck in traffic?  The “Thane of Cawdor!”

7.  What’s Macbeth’s favorite dessert?  “Ladyfingers”!

8.  Why did the actors in the play Macbeth never get lost? They always knew their “directions”!

9.  What did Macbeth say to the fortune teller who was always late?  “Hurry up with those prophecies, I’m ‘thane’ly waiting!”

10.  What do you call a sleepwalking Macbeth?  A “roaming thane”!

11.  How does Macbeth keep his shirts wrinkle-free?  He uses “thane-steam”!

12.  Why did the witches excel at math?  They were great at “casting spells”!

13.  What did Macbeth say to his favorite pair of shoes? “Out, damn spot!”

14.  Why did Macbeth start a blog?  To share his “bloody” good stories!

15.  What’s Macbeth’s favorite social media platform? “Thane-stagram”!

Hilarious Macbeth Jokes

Discover the lighter side of the Scottish play with our Macbeth Jokes. These humorous quips will have you quoting Shakespeare with a smile.

16.  Why did Macbeth become a gardener?  Because he loved to “plant” ideas in people’s minds!

17.  Knock, knock. Who’s there? Macbeth. Macbeth who? Macbeth, your life’s ambition is to enjoy!

18.  Why did Macbeth always carry an umbrella? To protect himself from the “storm” of his own conscience!

19.  What do you call a group of witches who perform a comedy act?  The “hubble, bubble, chuckle” sisters!

20.  Why did Macbeth bring a ladder to the theater?  He wanted to climb the “Duncan’s Line” and reach the throne!

21.  What did Macbeth say when he accidentally spilled his potion?  “Oops, I did it again, now I’ve got a ‘bloody’ mess!”

22.  How do you confuse Macbeth?  Show him three “double, double” vision mirrors!

23.  Why did the Scottish actor take on the role of Macbeth? He wanted to become the “thane” of comedy!

24.  What do you get when you mix Macbeth with a ghostly stand-up comedian?  A “spirited” performance!

25.  Why did Macbeth take up magic tricks?  He wanted to master the art of “out, damn spot” removal!

26.  What’s Macbeth’s favorite fruit?  “Banquo”anas – he’s always trying to change his fate!

27.  Why was Macbeth terrible at painting?  He couldn’t stop “MacDuffing” up his masterpiece!

28.  How does Macbeth like his coffee?  With a little “thane” of cream!

Hilarious Macbeth Jokes

29.  Why did Macbeth get a job at the zoo?  He heard they needed someone to “murder” the lion tamer!

30.  What do you call Macbeth when he’s nervous?  A “Thane-wreck”!

31.  Why did Macbeth switch to decaf?  He couldn’t handle the “double, double” espresso shots!

32.  What’s Macbeth’s favorite card game?  “Murder” bridge – he loves to play the villain!

33.  What’s Macbeth’s favorite part of a horror movie?  The “thane” of suspense!

34.  Why did Macbeth start a band?  He wanted to perform “unsex me here” as a heavy metal song!

Macbeth Dirty Jokes

Here are some fnny Macbeth Jokes that’ll make you laugh ’til the witches come home! Dive into the world of tragedy turned comedy with these clever jests.

35.  What’s the favorite dance move of a time-traveling bard? The Shakespeareroo!

36.  Why did the playwright go broke?  He spent all his quills on writing sonnets.

37.  How did the famous playwright respond to writer’s block?  “To write or not to write, that is the query.”

38.  Why did the sonnet go on a diet?  To trim down its verses and be iambic-pentameter ready!

39.  What did the theater manager say when the ghost walked on stage?  “We didn’t rehearse this spectral scene!”

40.  How did the audience react to the surprise twist in the play?  Gasps echoed like soliloquies in the crowd.

41.  What’s the favorite bedtime story of Shakespearean characters? “The Tales of Midsummer Night’s Dream.”

42.  Why did the director cast a chicken in the lead role?  To make the production “fowl-proof” with their clucking talent!

43.  What’s Shakespeare’s preferred way to unwind? Playing “Sonnet the Hedgehog,” his favorite video game!

44.  Why was it challenging to have a conversation with King Lear face to face?  Because he always Lear-ed intensely at anyone who tried!

45.  What happens when you place a copy of Macbeth on top of a dictionary?  You get a clever play on words!

46.  Why did the chickens avoid watching Hamlet? Because they were afraid of the murder most fowl!

47.  What do you call a pint-sized pig performing Shakespeare?  Hamlet, of course.

48.  Who’s the jittery javelin thrower?  None other than Shakespeare himself!

49.  There were kids arguing pointlessly about Shakespeare. In the end, it turned into “Much Ado About Nothing”!

50.  Me: Can I purchase a book by Shakespeare, please? Sales assistant: Which one?  Me: William, obviously!

51.  If Shakespeare were to write a prequel to ‘Hamlet,’ what clever title would he give it?  “Piglet”!

Macbeth Dirty Jokes

Macbeth Knock Knock Jokes

52. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Thane. Thane who? Thane you for inviting me to your castle!

53. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banquo. Banquo who? Banquo to the party with me, and we’ll haunt it together!

54. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lady. Lady who? Lady Macbeth, and I just can’t get this bloodstain out!

54. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Macduff. Macduff who? Macduff I challenge you to a duel!

55. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Duncan. Duncan who? Duncan in your dreams, Macbeth!

56. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Witch. Witch who? Witch way to the cauldron? I need a potion!

57. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dagger. Dagger who? Dagger you’ll see before you commit a dastardly deed!

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Bad Macbeth Jokes

58. What do you call a Macbeth actor who can’t get their lines right? A Mac-beth.

59. What’s Macbeth’s favorite video game? Assassin’s Creed.

60. Why did Macbeth cross the road? To get to the other side… and then kill the king.

61. What’s Macbeth’s favorite song? “Another One Bites the Dust.”

62. What do you call a Macbeth fan who can’t get enough of the play? A Mac-aholic.

63. What’s Macbeth’s favorite thing to do on a rainy day? Read the play.

64. Why did Macbeth go to the doctor? He had a dagger in his eye.

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Final Words

Shakespeare’s Macbeth is a masterpiece that explores profound themes of ambition, guilt, and the consequences of unchecked desires. So, let these Macbeth jokes entertain us, but let us also recognize the depth and brilliance of the source material behind them.

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